An entrepreneur friend and I were chatting the other day about his wonderful but too-long work weeks.
And he made the comment that overwork is a hard habit to break.
I told him that this is not the season for breaking habits.
Because in THIS season, we—and that includes YOU—you are being called to leap from the paradigms of your small self into being your Big Self and doing your Big Dreams.
And that’s not a leap you can make by breaking habits alone.
You have to break your identity.
And by that I mean interrupting your patterns, doing the fearless thing, all the things I mentioned here in Breaking your identity Part I.
But I want to go deeper than that today.
When you’re really ready to break your identity at the level you’ll need to break it to become your Big Self, here’s the mental model you’ll need. Conceptualize what you’re doing this way:
You need to rebrand yourself to yourself.
Yes, I want you to light Kali’s sacred fire and destroy some shit to create some shit.
But I also want you to get like Ganesha and INTEGRATE all of who you’ve been and what you’ve learned into the new, spiritually bionic, easeful, thriving identity you begin living into the moment after the destruction takes place.
In other words, when you break your identity and start shifting into your Big Self, you are not starting from scratch.
So, sure, I want you to know that you’ll need to embrace your inner Neith and let some of your old ways of being die tonight so you can start weaving a new world to life in the morning.
But more importantly, I want you to rebrand yourself TO YOURSELF.
I want you to get up while it’s still an hour or so till dawn dawns…
I want you to sit in the stillness and brain-dump all your old grudges and grievances and anxieties about the future onto the pages of your journal…
I want you to let the energetic ambrosia of creative power that swirls through the pre-dawn sky seeking to land in any and every open heart… let it flow to you and through you
I want you to let it inspire a fresh, new vision for your own identity.
I want you to write one phrase or one dozen pages describing the Big Self you would love to become…
And then I want you to fall madly, wildly, head-over-heels in love with that vision of yourself and your future.
Fall in love with your own Big Self.
And don’t worry about HOW your Big Self and Big Dreams will come to life.
Let the Divine handle the how.
Which is another way of saying: Let the emotional charge of your love for your own Big Self and Big Dreams carry you through the next steps.
Just stand down for a minute. You don’t have to work harder than anybody else to prevent unwanted things from happening here…
And you don’t have to spin every plate of making your Big Dreams happen, either.
This is a co-creative process, Brilliant One.
You and the whole entire Universe.
So. What do you do next?
Well first, stay willing to break some shit. And to burn some shit. Stay willing to integrate some of the ashes and the shit you burned.
Stay in love with the vision. You’ll need that heart—that courage—to dive into the free-floating, scary feeling energy that will arise as you take steps closer to your Big Self and your Big Dreams. You’ll need that courage to stay mindful that what feels like fear wants to transmute into exhilaration at what you’re becoming.
Stay willing to feel the fear and stay in the place of feeling it and facing it and wholeheartedly engaging with the subject of it, and stay self-compassionate enough to know that the fear sparking means you’re doing it right, 100% of the time.
Start doing some self-alignment-coaching.
At the beginning of each day, focus on your Big Self vision and ask yourself:
What’s not in alignment?
Look at your calendar and ask:
Is this in alignment?
In any conversation, consider your words before speaking them and, in that sacred pause, wonder yourself:
Are the words I’m about to speak in alignment with my Big Self? Before you send an email, is this email in alignment with my Big Self? You’ll know the answer.
Or take an hour on Sunday and reflect on where there are mis-alignments you can resolve between your Big Self, your Big Dreams and your values, identity, beliefs, decisions, actions, plans, calendar, expenditures of time and life force and money, relationships, systems, environments.
What’s in alignment? What’s not in alignment?
As you go, you’ll need to stay aware that there are costs and consequences to becoming your Big Self and doing your Big Dreams.
Some folk may not like Big You.
Some comfortable payoffs you’ve been getting out of staying small won’t be able to survive in the radiant glow thrown off by the Big You.
You might have to have some hard conversations with people… or with yourself.
But know this:
Definitionally, a SoulTour is a transformational journey to be your Big Self and do your Big Dreams.
I will never ask you to do something I haven’t done myself.
I’ve been doing this inner work and alignment work for the better part of 25 years, and I dwell in the wholeness, joy and radical liberation that’s on the other side of the pain.
Trust me when I say that you WILL love it here, in this world of the wondrous that is just waiting to swing into view for you.
Behind the scenes, I’ve been radically reinventing my own identity and SoulTour’s, too. I can’t wait to reopen this magically auspicious portal and welcome you to your own SoulTour.
This is a journey.
I’m honored to be your guide.
In the immortal words of the Reverend Dr. Erykah Badu…
Pack light. 🧳💡
Head up + heart out,
P.S.: Want more like this? Become a SoulTour subscriber for just $11 a month.
Tara-Nicholle Kirke, MA, Esq.
The Inner Critic Coach™️
Founder + CEO of SoulTour
@taranichollekirke on FB | TW | IG | LI
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